Mere moments after the Cincinnati
Bengals humiliating playoff loss to their cross-state rivals, the ever watchful
Internet of Memes went to work.
Sorry not sorry
The Michael
Jordan crying face was superimposed over the Bengals logo and replaced the
heads of various Cincinnati
players and fans. Meanwhile, this heartbroken young
woman was immortalized in gif form, doomed to weep over her team's failures
in a loop forever.
Not surprisingly, Cleveland was dragged into this depressing
conversation, thanks to shared geography and a recent history of
gridiron ineptitude. Bengals fan and ex-boybander Nick Lachey gave Cleveland its dubious props with this
woebegone tweet :
I'm done. A broken man. I can't do it
anymore. This is insanity. Only Cleveland
The Tweet of God, always
subtle as a kick to the sweetmeats in His holy Cleveland-bashing, had this to
report:
—
God (@TheTweetOfGod) January
10, 2016
I was rooting for the Bengals,
mainly because I wanted them to beat the Steelers. However, here in the
post-humiliation aftermath I don't exactly feel bad for Cincy's devastated
fanbase, either. It's actually kind of nice to have the improbable, embarrassing,
grasping-defeat-from-the-jaws-of-victory moment thrust upon another city.
This is an uncharitable thought so
devoid of empathy as to be borderline sociopathic. What are you gonna do, though? I
can't help it. It's not a matter of schadenfreude, it's
more a sense of relief that the shit is hitting someone else's fan(s), for
once.
Let another city hand-wring over
what could have been. Let them parse that one play that could have turned
soul-deadening defeat into the first post-season win in two decades. (Personally,
I'd be more haunted by the Jeremy Hill fourth-quarter fumble than Vontaze
Burfict and former TNA World
Tag Team Champion Adam Jones losing their respective minds. See, I'm not a
monster!)
If nothing else, the Bengals'
meltdown can take our minds off the latest "smartest guy in the room"
shenanigans
taking place in Berea .
We have a former lawyer with no
personnel experience making roster decisions. What could go wrong? Thanks to Cincinnati 's agony-inducing
incompetence last night, that's one rhetorical question we don't have to
examine for at least a day or two.
Thank you, Bengals!