The screams, the humiliation, the fact that it wasn't the Browns!

Tweet

Mere moments after the Cincinnati Bengals humiliating playoff loss to their cross-state rivals, the ever watchful Internet of Memes went to work. 

Sorry not sorry

The Michael Jordan crying face was superimposed over the Bengals logo and replaced the heads of various Cincinnati players and fans. Meanwhile, this heartbroken young woman was immortalized in gif form, doomed to weep over her team's failures in a loop forever.

Not surprisingly, Cleveland was dragged into this depressing conversation, thanks to shared geography and a recent history of gridiron ineptitude. Bengals fan and ex-boybander Nick Lachey gave Cleveland its dubious props with this woebegone tweet :

I'm done. A broken man. I can't do it anymore. This is insanity. Only Cleveland knows more pain. Change is needed. #Bengals #WhoDey

— Nick Lachey (@NickLachey) January 10, 2016

The Tweet of God, always subtle as a kick to the sweetmeats in His holy Cleveland-bashing, had this to report:

I hate Cleveland, but Cincinnati hates Cincinnati. #CINvsPIT

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) January 10, 2016

I was rooting for the Bengals, mainly because I wanted them to beat the Steelers. However, here in the post-humiliation aftermath I don't exactly feel bad for Cincy's devastated fanbase, either. It's actually kind of nice to have the improbable, embarrassing, grasping-defeat-from-the-jaws-of-victory moment thrust upon another city.

This is an uncharitable thought so devoid of empathy as to be borderline sociopathic. What are you gonna do, though? I can't help it. It's not a matter of schadenfreude, it's more a sense of relief that the shit is hitting someone else's fan(s), for once.

Let another city hand-wring over what could have been. Let them parse that one play that could have turned soul-deadening defeat into the first post-season win in two decades. (Personally, I'd be more haunted by the Jeremy Hill fourth-quarter fumble than Vontaze Burfict and former TNA World Tag Team Champion Adam Jones losing their respective minds. See, I'm not a monster!)

If nothing else, the Bengals' meltdown can take our minds off the latest "smartest guy in the room" shenanigans taking place in Berea. We  have a former lawyer with no personnel experience making roster decisions. What could go wrong? Thanks to Cincinnati's agony-inducing incompetence last night, that's one rhetorical question we don't have to examine for at least a day or two.

Thank you, Bengals!

Right now, Browns new boss is the same as the old boss

Tweet

The Browns ended another season today like they have so many before; losing to the Steelers at home as a crowd of happy yinzers waved their Terrible Towels in triumph. Hellish familiarity is going to be part of the upcoming off-season as well, with owner Jimmy Haslam deep-sixing Mike Pettine and Ray Farmer just about any second now.  

Do you trust this man?

The next few months will cover the usual stopovers on the Browns Train of Doom: Coach search, GM search, NFL combine, draft preparation and so on. We've seen this process play out before under numerous front office iterations. Question is, do you trust the man in charge to actually hire the right people this time? Furthermore, can you believe we're actually having this conversation about yet another owner?

Haslam was the one who was supposed to change the franchise's fortunes following the half-hearted stewardship of Randy Lerner. He came from a respected, orderly organization in Pittsburgh, where you'd think he would have learned something about football operations from the rock-solid Rooneys.

Instead, Haslam's three-plus years of ownership have resulted in one FBI investigation, two head coaches and, if the latest reports are accurate, three front offices. It's hard to believe Browns fans - as always the most painfully put-upon victims of the team's travails - are worse off than they were with Lerner, but here we are.

With substantial changes once more in the offing, the fanbase's lone hope may be Haslam seeking outside assistance in finding a new coach and general manager. There were rumors about retired Green Bay Packers executive bringing his gridiron smarts to Berea, but Wolf himself recently denied those reports.

Sadly, Browns backers are again peering through dark clouds for the scantest ray of light, as long as it's not named Ray. But with Haslam calling the shots, the future of the worst-run franchise in professional sports remains as ominous as ever. 

What CST thinks about Browns-Steelers today

Tweet

Cleveland Browns vs. Pittsburgh Steelers
January 3, 2016

Steelers 31, Browns 10

It would seem the sideshow that is the Browns--coach and GM reported to be fired, QB out partying in Vegas with a concussion unless he wasn't, complete joke of an organization--would be the lowest possible point. But it has been here so many times before, often ending with a Steelers loss and a complete reboot.

                                            Steelers 48, Browns 3

The Steelers embarrass the Browns. The stadium will be full of Terrible Towels, which will make the game tough to stomach. Change is coming at some point today. With Mike Pettine willingly throwing the front office, his coaching staff, and anyone else under the bus, should make for an interesting "sources say" article later in the week. I wish all the skeletons would just come out so we can start clean. I'm hopeful they hire someone with LEGIT experience. I'm done with the 1st time GM/coach route which has not worked. After the debacle of a coaching search last time the pool for the Browns job seems pretty shallow.

Steelers 27, Browns 6

Third-string quarterback starting in the last game in a sure-to-be loss against the would-be division rivals, on the eve of the entire front office getting blown out of the airlock. There will come a day when this scenario changes, but this humble Browns fan cannot envision when that day will come.

Steelers 30, Browns 13

If elected, Donald Trump will build a wall around First Energy Stadium to keep out the Pittsburgh rapists! Trump/Haslam 2016!

Steelers 31, Browns 10

System failure...reboot.

Could Johnny Manziel really have lied again about partying?

Tweet

What a freaking joke this Cleveland Browns organization is. I'm a supporter of Johnny Manziel as a possible solution for the Browns at QB. I like his game. But it seems obvious that Manziel has some issues, which no armchair psychologist like me should try to diagnose. The fact that he recently lied to the face of his coaches about "partying" after being named starter--given a chance to lead an NFL franchise, makes his character very suspect.

And then Saturday night--the night before the season finale, and just days after Manziel was diagnosed with a concussion and ruled out of said game, USA Today, using "employees and patrons" as their sources, said Manziel was spotted in Vegas.

Then this ridiculous social media exchange happened. Manziel "denied" it by sorta posting that he was home with his dog in Avon, Ohio. An the Planet Hollywood casino totally played along, trolling Manziel with expertise. 

#SaturdayNights

A photo posted by Johnny Manziel (@jmanziel2) on Jan 2, 2016 at 6:05pm PST

#SaturdayNights pic.twitter.com/8QDJ5mnhf5

— Planet Hollywood (@PHVegas) January 3, 2016

For one, I really doubt that Manziel would have gone gambling (and likely drinking) in Vegas now, on the eve of a game, after everything that he has been criticized over the last weeks months years. But that said, nothing surprised me any more. If it comes out that he went to Vegas, without permission, and then used Instagram to lie about it? Then forget about him, he can't be trusted any more. Cut bait Monday morning. But I'm really hoping that's not true, and he's starting next September, with the Browns draft picks filling in the substantial gaps around him.

What CST thinks about Ohio State in the Fiesta Bowl today

Tweet

The Fiesta Bowl: Ohio State Buckeyes vs. Notre Dame Fighting Irish
January 1, 2016

Buckeyes 45, Fighting Irish 17

A decade later and it's Ohio State over Notre Dame again. OSU redeems the B1G after Sparty embarrassed themselves.

Buckeyes 34, Fighting Irish 21

As a fan, it's difficult to get up for this non-playoff, non-Rose Bowl contest. However, the Buckeyes should be motivated and talented enough to take care of business in Scottsdale.

Buckeyes 37, Fighting Irish 17

The Buckeyes are one of the best teams the country and will show that today. Too bad they didn't show that all year.

Buckeyes 42, Fighting Irish 17

I'm sort of salty that CST forces me to predict glorified exhibition games. Gimme a bottle of anything and dat 8-team playoff.

Buckeyes 35, Fighting Irish 21

Hoping Braxton Miller has a nice game. Dude deserves it.

Buckeyes 38, Fighting Irish 21

The Trump Train rolls into 2016 with unstoppable momentum. Go, Donald, go!