Monday, October 22, 2007

Froms Rants in Honor of Hadman Rants

The things that annoyed and/or pissed me off during the ALCS...

1. How many f'ing times did Fox have to show the Boston bullpen playing their little hex instrumental on the lip of the bullpen roof? I don't know what annoyed me more... the Sox pen doing it, or the fact that Fox showed it at least once a game and Buck and McCarver cracked up every time. (I'll get to McCarver soon enough).

2. Jeanne Zelasko - I mean come on. She's as much worthy of hosting a sports pre-game show as I am of drinking a six pack of beer by myself in less than four hours. Her best moment was before Game 5... saying the Sox had us "right where they wanted us" (with Beckett pitching for a chance to go back to Fenway).Ummm, this was BEFORE the game. We were up 3 game to 1 at the time!

This is from Brian McPeek of Swerbs Blurbs, not from me so please don't tell me how inappropriately harsh I am...
"If I want to watch a pig like Jeanne Zelasko I'll rent ‘Babe' or turn on Discovery channel. Just NBC football pre-game with the sound turned down. I love listening to Bob Costas with the sound down. Best way to hear him. "

Thought the Costas dig was pretty funny too.

3. Kevin Kennedy - that pocked-faced jabronie has always grated on me.

4. Tim McCarver - Just when I thought (and I think I even said it to someone) "Hmmmm - Tim McCarver seems to be on his best behavior this year" the Tribe begins their gradual choke job and I just get more and more annoyed by McCarver. I think he was better this year, but his patronizing tone and long-winded statements make me long for the Bob Costas/Bob Uecker days.

5. Manny - I used to like Manny even on the BoSox because he was Manny... our little brother who we saw grow-up... errrrr.... play in Cleveland. But in this series he was just a jackass. Nice hair Manny. Anytime your hat or helmet won't stay on your head when you're running... errrr... jogging means it's a little out of control.

6. The fans at the Jake trying to start the wave. Its not 1988 jackasses. Some dude (I'd say in his late 20s early 30s) was trying to start one in the 7th inning of Game 4. Nobody would do it and he was getting pissed, like he was the only "true fan". The guy in front of me yelled at him to "sit his ass down, we aren't 7!" Sounded VERY familiar for some reason

7. Kevin Millar - the day one of my athletes blatantly roots for another team (in my division) is the day that athlete can go play somewhere else... unless that athlete's name is LeBron James. (Rumor has it they wanted Pedro to read the lineup one night but the Mets nixed it... the Orioles not so much).

8. Jonathan Papelbon - the river dance in his jockies, barefoot was utterly embarrassing and painful to watch. It made Mark Madsen's "Who Let the Dogs Out" blast seem like Whitney Houston proudly singing the National Anthem at the Superbowl in the midst of the first Iraq War.
And how about some lip moisturizer dude? You look like Dr. Freeze from Batman.
(By the way, how Hafner missed three straight Papelbon fastballs down the gut is beyond me... last year he could've closed his eyes and hit one of those out).

9. Dustin Pedroia - yeah he's an Angles-n-Jobber, but the gnats from Game 2 of ALDS think you're annoying. Anyone got a fly swatter? Craig Counsell called... he wants his gimmick back.

10. Curt Schilling - does any one guy bask in the limelight like Schilling? The dude searches out cameras and scripts his words to perfection. Schilling's hero? Well.... Schilling. At least he didn't go with the ketchup on the sock routine this year. I expected him to report a broken arm prior to Game 6 and then pitch "a heroic performance".

I could go on with the mood I'm in today, but I'll end with one giant bonus #11 - that goes to the Cleveland Indians.... all of them.... Hafner, Wedge (for not moving Hafner down), Sizemore, Perez, C.C., Carmona, and Joel "The Stop Sign" Skinner.

Back to normal life...