Sunday, September 18, 2016

What CST thinks about Browns-Ravens today

Posted by at 12:46 PM

Baltimore Ravens at Cleveland Browns 
September 18, 2016


 Ravens 31, Browns 17

What a week. Griffin, Salazar, Cookie. At least we have the Buckeyes. And the 73-win Warriors blew a 3-1 lead. But the Browns' "basic" defense couldn't stop Oklahoma, let alone a real NFL team.

Ravens 24, Browns 14
It's a long day for the team AND the fans. Two late scores make the final seem a lot closer than the game was. Boo birds will be out in force, even in the first half.

Browns 24, Ravens 21

Even the worst Browns teams have a surprise win in them, and today's home opener is it for 2016. McCown has played well against the Ravens, and a couple of our young defenders made impact plays in last week's loss. I have no idea where this optimism is coming from, and it may not last a quarter, but I'll ride the good vibes for all they're worth.
Ravens 24, Browns 17

I think McCown keeps it close, but we kind of suck.

Ratbirds 20, Browns 17

Thanks Obama!

Ravens 34, Browns 12

 Not even my halftime ice cream sandwich can save this team.











Browns 60, Ravens 2

I learned to handicap NFL games through a three-credit online course at Trump University. Best investment EVER!




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Sunday, September 11, 2016

What CST thinks about Browns-Eagles today

Posted by at 11:00 AM

Cleveland Browns at Philadelphia Eagles
September 11, 2016


Eagles 33, Browns 20

 Praying that RG3 shows signs of life, along with the new receiving corps and Duke. And that the defense can hold Carson Wentz under 35 points. He could have been a Brown, but we will never regret it.

Eagles 28, Browns 10
Carson Wentz doesn't light the world on fire, but looks more then capable against the Browns porous defense. The offense looks ok, but struggles to come up with anything on third down. Get ready to see a lot of punting. It's 68 degrees and partly sunny today in Cleveland, spend time with the kids, work in the yard, read a book at the park, do something else...there is nothing to see here.

Eagles 24, Browns 13

So begins the death march that is the 2016 Browns season. Journalists have an expression that goes, 'Root for the story,' so maybe Cleveland can beat passed over rookie QB Carson Wentz and keep the media at bay for a week. However, even if Wentz puts up 300 yards and three touchdowns, it's because the Browns are horrible, not that Wentz is Johnny Unitias.
 
Browns 17 Eagles 13

Carson Wentz played at North Dakota State and has played 1 preseason game. I hope Ray Horton can come up with a game plan to confuse Wentz even with our awful defense. Somewhat excited to see if RGIII can revive his career. Browns snap opener losing streak.


Browns 19, Eagles 17

Because I'd rather not wake up in a world where the Browns were wrong about Carson Wentz.

Browns 42, Eagles 10

The Browns roll into Philadelphia with all the freight-train momentum of Glorious Alpha Demigod Trump's march to the White House.
Eagles 24, Browns 17


The Browns may lose today, but defeat will be but a sour memory when God Emperor Trump takes the Oval Office in two months.




Eagles 35, Browns 14

 The Cavs won the championship.





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The 2016 CST NFL and Browns predictions

Posted by at 8:30 AM

Cleveland Browns 2016 Season

3-13, Last in AFC North
Super Bowl: Arizona over Denver

A year or two ago, I thought the Browns could win anywhere between four and ten games, and had no clue which way that would go. (SPOILER ALERT: it wasn't ten wins.) This year it's anywhere from zero to six wins. I am semi-on the RG3 bandwagon, and hope the offense can score consistently for the first time in awhile. The defense, however, is unable to keep the other team's score above the Browns more than a couple times this year.
2-14, Last in AFC North
Super Bowl: Seattle over Pittsburgh
The summer started with the Cavs winning, and now has ended with the Indians pushing to the division title. That leaves us with the Browns, unfortunately. I see no reason for hope with this team, If RG3 is great will he really be the QB of the future? Heck no-- he will move on to greener pastures if the Browns rebuild him. Mid-season trades of Joe Thomas and Joe Haden leave the team on the fast track to the #1 pick. We all know that's the goal this year.


3-13, last in AFC North
Super Bowl: Carolina over Pittsburgh

My go-to Browns prediction is usually 6-10, but for this year, six wins is the team's ceiling. Cleveland is a bottomed out franchise aiming to rebuild through the draft. That's fine, I guess, but I need to see competitive football and the emergence of two or three consistent young starters. Low expectations, yep, but there's not going to much else to keep my attention in 2016.
 5-11, last in AFC North
Super Bowl: New England over Carolina

The sun will come out tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow
There'll be sun

The offense might have a moment or two but the defense is really bad. I think Hue Jackson is the most competent coach we've had in long time. Hue gets the most out of this team, which is unfortunately only good for 5 wins. 


4-12, last in AFC North
Super Bowl: Packers over Bengals

It's a billion-dollar business and the backbone of American culture, so the alteration or demise of the NFL, and Football as we know it today, will be tragic and fascinating. Won't happen tomorrow or even ten years from now, but any activity so openly dependent on sideline-Neurologists will be gradually condemned to groundbreaking change.  Of course, the question begs: will we see the Browns in the SuperBowl before flags are strapped to Quarterbacks? Not Fucking Likely.
2-14, last in AFC North
Super Bowl: Seattle over New England

 "So shines a good deed in a weary world"
-WW

Somehow we always stay a "Browns town."
The Tribe and Cavs are our good deeds; the Browns our weary world.


2-14, last in AFC North

Super Bowl: Green Bay over New England

 No more free passes. No more wasted Sundays. The Cavs winning the championship opened up my world and the Browns shall not suck me back into the abyss.







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Thursday, August 4, 2016

Breitbart uses Cavs Parade as stand-in for Trump Jacksonville rally, and Cleveland twitter responds

Posted by at 11:30 AM

This is just too much.


Yesterday evening Breitbart News, a conservative site, posted an article about the YUUUUGE crowds for Donald Trump in Jacksonville, and accompanied a photo of said crowd.


Unfortunately, that ain't Jacksonville. And it took approximately 1 second for Cleveland twitter to find out. The first reaction I personally saw was from a fantastic Good Morning America social media dude who apparently likes Cleveland too...
Unfortunately, some Trump supporters didn't get the memo fast enough. (Well, apparently this nice lady deleted her tweet finally...)


And of course, Cleveland twitter picked it up, because NBA Twitter is the best Twitter, the Indians were stinking up the joint at the time, and Cavs fans still are celebrating.
















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Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Sports Months, Ranked

Posted by at 6:30 PM

1. October. Baseball playoffs, NFL and NHL and college football in full mode, Browns may even not be eliminated yet at this point. Bonus!
2. May. NBA Playoffs with games every single night. Enough said. But also warmer-than-freezing baseball, the Kentucky Derby, NHL playoffs, etc.
3. June. NBA Finals and NHL Stanley Cup Finals. Nice. And the US Open is pretty cool.
4. March. March Madness makes up for an otherwise slow month in the major pro sports.
5. January. NFL Playoffs and Super Bowl (I'll throw this in January for all intents and purposes.)
6. April. Opening Day for Baseball, The Masters, and finally the slog of the NBA regular season is over giving way to meaningful games again. Oh and the NFL Draft!
7. September. Best weather of the year, NFL and College is back, and pennant races in baseball too.
8. November. The month where Ohio State beats Michigan, and the best day of the year, Thanksgiving, with tons of food and some football to boot.
9. December. NBA and NFL in full effect, and if you like to gamble, you have 27,000 bowl games to choose from.
10. August. Yay, NFL is almost here! Unless you're a season ticket holder, and are paying for 2 exhibition games at full price.
11. July. Uggh. Even the regular early month #WojBomb can't save this horrific month.
12. Getting hit by a bus. (with apologies to Deadspin.)
13. February. The doldrums of the NBA season, and the despair of football being gone. Plus you are going out of your mind from the weather. Just book a flight to Mexico now.



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