How NFL broadcasts are shown (or not shown) across the country is a puzzle every week. Blackout rules, doubleheader rules, other ridiculous rules make it pretty much a mystery. For instance, if the Browns have a sold out home game (on CBS in this instance), and the other network (say, Fox), is scheduled to have a doubleheader, they are not permitted to air a game opposite the Browns game, leading the local affiliate to run exciting episodes of 'Taxi' or 'American Idol Auditions'.
Amazing.
Well, for the past few years I've been living in Chicago, and with the lack of national television games for the Brownies, I'm normally at the Red Ivy Chitown Dawg Pound in Wrigleyville every Thursday, Sunday afternoon or night, or Monday night.. Definitely the best place to watch the games, but what about when I'm traveling? Does the NFL publish where their games are going to be shown? Apparently not, because the only place to find out what games are where, for the past umpteen number of years, is on a great sports TV resource blog called The 506. Great resource to check if you're ever curious on what's going to be on tv, not only in the NFL, but in all major sports.
Well due to 1% geography, and 99% to the predicted crappiness of the product, only about 3.8% of the United States is going to be subject to Steve Tasker and Bill Macatee and the Jaguars-Browns this Sunday. But if the Browns continue their ways, you could switch over to golf, soccer, or an old episode of Seinfeld.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Thankfully only 4% of the US is subject to Browns-Jags this weekend
Sunday, November 13, 2011
'Factory of sadness' gears up for holidays
 |
| It wasn't your fault, Phil. |
First, a positive note: For another game in which the endzone was lidded against the Browns like a welded-shut manhole cover, the offense showed some ingenuity in what rather pathetically was its best performance in weeks. Coach Shurmur seemed to recognize that run-run-short pass wasn't doing it and broke out with some much needed trickery. Wildcat formations, end arounds, and by God shotgun formations all made appearances.
What we think will happen vs. the Rams (Week 10)
November 13, 2011
Brian
 |
Rams 8
Browns 3 | Fortunately, I was out of the country for the past week, where the sports news was all Penn State, all the time. I almost forgot how anemic the play calling of Ohio State and the Browns are. Unfortunately the Buckeyes reminded me yesterday, and I'm forced to pick a Chris Bermanesque ridiculous score for this game. Who knew that Browns season ticket holders were paying for the equivalent of 5 (or maybe 12) preseason games featuring teams that belong on a practice squad? Oh, and thanks DeSean Jackson, as I'll be starting Greg Little on my fantasy team today. Whoo-hoo!! |
Tom
 |
Rams 14
Browns 6 | The Browns will find it difficult to do anything right today. The offensive scoring rides on the leg of Phil Dawson. The defense doesn't do much better containing Steven Jackson. Probably should avoid the game all together, but much like an accident it's hard to not want to watch. |
Doug
 |
Rams 13
Browns 6 | The Browns are plagued by ineptness and injuries, while the Rams at least have a running game. This team as of late has given us no reason to think they can overcome even the slightest adversity, so why should today be any different? |
Kevin
 | Browns 9 Rams 7 | To quote Doctor Emmett Brown in Back to the Future, when asked why he went against his own better judgment, read Marty's letter about the future, and risked screwing up the space time continuum, "Well, I figured, what the hell?" Sometimes, there just are no real good explanations. If the Browns don't win today, they may never win again. |
SamVox
 |
Rams 16
Browns 13
| Hopefully Coach Shurmur leaves town with the Rams. |
Ryan
 | Rams 17 Browns 10 | The Browns offense is pathetic and unimaginative. The defense can keep us in it for a little bit but knowing we have no offense leaves no hope that the Browns can win this game. (Editor's note: I just left this comment in from last week.) |
Sean
 | Rams 21 Browns 20 | (Editor's note: I don't think any number of Phil Dawson field goals add up to 20.) |
Top 10 Billy Joel Songs
Up against a deadline, some crazy shit can become a column. And why not? I have no editor, no filter and, sometimes, no shame. Yes, yes- the V stands for vexing, the O for outrageous, and the X for GenX. In simpler terms, advertisers be damned when my pen finds this space! This week, however, calls for a family-friendly countdown. I'm going WDOK on your ass. See, mid-week, our very silent contributor Sean mentioned that 11/11 was the anniversary of a Billy Joel concert he attended with his wife and sister-in-law. That got me thinking about the artist we all hate to love, because Billy Joel conquered the world by being uncool. And if he's everybody's guilty pleasure, then we've all attained innocence by the sheer volume of Joel's undeniable popularity. I like him. You like him. Chuck Klosterman likes him. Christie Brinkley liked him. There's really nothing to feel guilty about anymore. Let's do this:
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Unwatchable Browns testing Cleveland's loyalty
 |
| How much longer must we watch this? |
The Browns crossed a line on Sunday. I don't mean the goal-line, which is prohibited for them to traverse until they're down big in the fourth quarter. Nor do I mean the opponent's 33-yard-line, a demarcation from whence the right foot of Phil Dawson becomes the team's most potent offensive weapon.
No, the Browns doglike rollover against Houston marked the moment in the season when Cleveland football became unwatchable instead of merely tedious. The Browns have been steadily reaching this point all year, but the actual threshold crossing happened like a stroke of lightning thanks to a quick Houston touchdown followed by a Cleveland fumble on their first play from scrimmage. Bang, it's 14-zip and you're looking for something else to do with an unseasonably warm fall afternoon.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)